(Kirkland resident and Google engineer Steve Lacey, 43, was killed in a road rage incident he was not involved in last July. The driver, Patrick Rexroat, whose blood-alcohol level was three times the legal limit, pleaded guilty to vehicular homicide and reckless driving last week).

My fundamental right to be here today was removed by a drunk driver.

I cannot live my life as before. I cannot show up to hearings on a whim, I cannot go out for an impromptu meal with friends, I cannot go off snowboarding for the day. You see when one parent is killed the other has to assume the role of two parents.

The cost to my family from someone else’s decision to serve themselves is that my life is very much restricted. It does feel like I am serving a long sentence myself for something that I did not do. In this sentence I will not get out early for good behavior. In my sentence I spend my days missing Steve and wishing that I’d at least been able to tell him that I loved him before he left us.

I spend my days watching my children miss their dad. There’s no one there to help them perfect their sports or watch the game with. Steve taught the kids music, math and welding. There is no one to do that anymore, instead we get to watch from behind our own bars. My children get to watch their friends spending time with their dads.

Steve’s parents are going to age not having their son visiting them or helping them. Steve’s dad turned 70 in January, can you imagine the pain he went through on his birthday? While some people get to spend their retirement years enjoying the fruits of their labor, Steve’s parents begin a lifelong sentence of grief and bereavement for the son that was loved beyond words.

The Lacey family’s sentence for vehicular homicide is going to last a lifetime with no chance of parole.

Nabila Lacey, Kirkland